Thursday, May 18, 2006

Walls of Waste




Throughout the centuries of human history enormous amounts of money and labor have been devoted to the construction of walls -- around castles, around city states, and even between nations. After reading today's newspaper headline, "Senate Votes to Put Fence on Border", regarding the US Senate's plan to create a 370 mile "triple barrier" fence along the US-Mexico border my first thought was of some of my favorite fences/walls in the world:

1.) Hadrian's Wall -- to keep the Scots out of the Roman Empire. Result -- Rome went out of business :)

2.) Great Wall of China -- to keep invaders out of China. Result -- today this one-party state has built a "wall" on the Internet to keep out bad thoughts like personal liberty.

3.) Berlin Wall -- to keep the Evil West out of the Workers' Paradise that was East Germany. Result -- West and East Germany re-united and the wall came down but was replaced by today's "wall" known as the European Social Model which is the world's largest producer of economic stagnation.

4.) Maginot Line -- built by the French to keep the German military out of France. Result - German paratroopers landed on the opposite side of the wall and shot the French since no guns were installed on the French side of the wall. Not only a waste of French francs but an incredible waste of human life.

5.) Israel -- In an effort to REALLY upset the Palestinians the Israeli government is extending its wall system to create a mind set of caged rats. Result -- more "holy" war but yet Nobel Peace Prizes are still awarded for anyone that "tries" to secure peace in the Middle East. Note to Nobel Committee -- why don't you try to award "success" one year versus "nice attempts"?!!

However, this article failed to mention the plan's monetary cost -- but who cares what the cost is for this exciting public works project right?? This will make us safe from terrorists and even worse...................... low cost hotel cleaning staff!!! I am counting on my friends at Citizens Against Government Waste, http://www.cagw.org, to convince Congress this new wall is a complete waste of money. This waste was highlighted on CNN this morning via a story they had regarding tunnels that have been created under the US-Mexico border used for smuggling drugs and humans apparently. So if Mexicans can't walk across the border or tunnel their way to the USA why not use the "Maginot option" by flying a plane over the US border to have Mexicans parachute into the US of A? Would our next move be the scrambling of F-18s to bring such planes down?

Okay, I hear you asking me -- "so what Space Beagle, it is easy to trash this wall idea but what would you propose we do to live in peace and harmony beyond drinking a Coca Cola together while singing?"

Well, here we go........................there are 535 Members in the US Congress and while I have not checked with all of them I feel rather confident that none of them have proposed the following piece of legislation which I call the "Space Beagle Wall"(SBW). The SBW's central theme is a crazy one -- it uses the power of the referendum to let voters determine their fates not public officials. I propose we secure an international treaty with the United Mexican States (Mexico's official name) which allows each of their 31 states to conduct a binding referendum watched by a group of international observers. These states include:

UNITED MEXICAN STATES:

Aguascalientes, Baja California, Baja California Sur, Campeche, Chiapas, Chihuahua, Coahuila de Zaragoza, Colima, Distrito Federal*, Durango, Guanajuato, Guerrero, Hidalgo, Jalisco, Mexico, Michoacan de Ocampo, Morelos, Nayarit, Nuevo Leon, Oaxaca, Puebla, Queretaro de Arteaga, Quintana Roo, San Luis Potosi, Sinaloa, Sonora, Tabasco, Tamaulipas, Tlaxcala, Veracruz-Llave, Yucatan, Zacatecas

The single referendum question would be whether or not the citizens of the respective state want to secede from Mexico to join the United States of America as "states of the Union" bound by the US Constitution and all respective laws while completely renouncing all ties to the United Mexican States -- a clean break and transfer from one nation-state to another if the voters choose via the ballot box not via military operations.

Now THAT is what I call immigration reform. We have accepted economic refugees from all around the world so if the Mexican economy is that poorly managed by the current government let us provide the opportunity to Mexicans to fully assimilate into Americans by casting their vote not jumping over a fence.

Fences are for domestic animals,

Todd

2 comments:

BRYAN said...

Interesting idea not sure that I agree, but still interesting.

jdsqrd said...

How could you leave out Pink Floyd's Wall? It kept out everything and only needed the loss of a parent, an abusive school master, an unfaithful spouse, an over inflated ego, and substance abuse. The US has a good start on the last two...