Thursday, October 12, 2006

An Ounce of Freedom

Well if the terrorists who attacked the World Trade Center on 9-11 wanted to ensure there is more body odor in the world they have won!!!

On Tuesday and Wednesday this week I had to complete an overnight business trip to Connecticut thus I brought only one piece of luggage -- a combination lap top/overnight bag -- packed with my bare essentials. As I approached the security check point in Minneapolis I fully complied with the "no liquids" commands coming from the T.S.A. (Thousands Standing Around as my buddy Chuck Muth,, calls them!!) person by placing my mini-tube of toothpaste and spray deodorant in the plastic bag so I could "declare" these goods.

Granted since my deodorant was a 4 ounce can I was pushing my luck since TSA regulations (current ones that is) that only 3 ounces or less are allowed. But the personal hygiene gods were watching over me as security allowed me to take these items with me to Connecticut in my carry on luggage. However, as I approached the security checkpoint at JFK Airport in New York City to return to Minneapolis the TSA person at the entrance forced me to dispose of my 4 ounce can of deodorant -- clearly that "one extra ounce" was going to jeopardize the USA -- but the mini-tube of tooth paste was approved!!! As a freedom lover I protested this TSA directive by leaving my toothpaste on the conveyor belt since I assume TSA people are at least qualified to pick up garbage!!! Yes, a small victory for freedom :-)

It is an amazing world where an entirely new federal department -- Department of Homeland Security -- is created only to have citizens reduced to herded sheep reading their product labels and taking off their shoes all in the name of security. Speaking of security -- I was reminded of a flight I took to Washington DC about two weeks ago where I had a VERY obese woman in front of me at the security check point who was TOO LARGE to walk through the new "air jet" body scanners used at some security gates so she was told to walk ("waddle") around this new, expensive machine. Fortunately I was able to get past her before TSA conducted the full body search!!!

Enjoy your travels,



Anonymous said...

May you never suffer from a phsical defect as crippling as your defect of character.

Waddle, indeed.

Todd said...

The English language provides plenty of descriptive words for personal mobility -- walking, jogging, running -- the woman I saw was clearly waddling like a duck not walking like a human.

After she left the security gate she ate an entire pizza (at 3 pm) while we waited for our flight then on the flight I saw this same woman eat again about 3 hours later.

A "physical defect" to me would not include obesity. Historically speaking obesity was considered a sign of wealth in the past but clearly it is something quite different today -- perhaps a sign that the concept of personal responsibility is an ancient concept itself?